Not a Death Knell

So after all that hullaballo about how I just ended this friendship with a person I knew for over a decade, guess what? Our e-mail exchange, which started out bitter and angry, eventually turned in to some introspection and analysis of our own actions and thoughts from over a decade ago. I know I’m the kind of person who is able to hold a grudge, but damn! Reading the e-mails from this other person, the disagreement we had about a decade ago seems really, really silly. It kind of makes me wonder why I was even feeling hurt and mad all these years.

What helped is that both of us were willing to dig in to some old wounds to figure out what happeend and this got us talking. I’m kind of proud of myself because at one point during our heated e-mail exchange I wrote in to this person thanking her for her friendship and for the wonderful times we had spent together. I can trace this directly to the years I have spent as a teacher- the idea of the sandwich feedback has been drilled in to me so much that I felt I had to say something good, anything. Whaddya know?! It worked.

I don’t know where we are going to go from here, but that hurt and pain has lessened wonderfully. If nothing else, this episode will help me let go ofthe events of over a decade ago.


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